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Surrender.
Oh, how I hate that word. For me, it conjures up thoughts of weakness, and I do not like to consider myself weak.
I remember many years ago when I was walking through a particularly tough time with something. I wanted to control the situation and make it turn out the way I thought it should. I wanted the other person involved to apologize and make amends for what she had done.
Yet, you know what ended up happening? After I had absolutely exhausted myself over stewing and rethinking things; after being so consumed with hatred and revengeful thoughts; after blaming God for allowing all the trouble to come my way in the first place, I surrendered.
I waved the white flag. Falling on my knees I cried out to God to take this--everything--the hurt, the betrayal, the anger, the resentment, and instead fill me with peace and forgiveness and acceptance.
You know what? He did.
Maybe you are struggling with surrender today. Really, it's okay. God is not put off by your struggle. Matter-of-fact, if you'll be still long enough He will tell you that He's right there in the middle of it with you.
But how do you get to that point? Are there things you can do when you are so bent out of shape over something that you can't get past?
First, pray. You know that's my answer for everything, but it is the answer for everything. God wants you to verbalize your struggles to Him. He knows them, but He wants you to lay them at His feet.
Second, visualize actually handing them over. I used to have a picture hanging in my office that showed Jesus on a throne and a mother walking away after handing her child over to Him. It was powerful. What it displayed to me was that sometimes...a lot of times, we have to visualize our problems. We have to see ourselves walking up to God and handing them over, then turning around and leaving them in His hands. It has tremendously helped me. I think it can help you too.
Third, resolve to not pick it up again. Meaning, when you begin to stew and fret over it, go to God and re-hand it over. Don't allow your thoughts to dwell there. Make peace with the fact that God is bigger, greater, stronger, more knowledgeable, etc., and knows exactly His course of action with this distraction of yours. Leave it alone, friend. It's not yours to carry.
Finally, journal your progress. I find that writing is therapy for my soul. I've always kept a journal to jot things that I want to remember or the way God has answered certain prayers I've wrestled with. Write your thoughts down. Own up to the struggle your having but don't let it consume you. Be sure to note every time God gives a God-wink or has confirmed He is still in control. Trust me, it will help in the process.
So, what has been the biggest hurdle you've had to cross? What's the spiritual lesson that God has taught or is in the process of teaching you? I'd love to hear all about it.